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I have only had one personal encounter with
bullying, in which I was a witness. It all took place in my
eighth grade history class. My friend Mike* was showing off
because the teacher had left the room to take a phone call.
He always acted like he was better than anyone else, so it
didn’t surprise anyone, when he began making fun of one
of the girls in my class. Her name was Rachel*. Rachel was
very quiet, never participating in conversations with the
other students. Her family did not have a lot of money, and
lived beside the town dump. At the beginning of the year,
I had tried to befriend her, but she
closed herself off. Rachel was very religious. She always
carried a bible around with her and wore a cross around her
neck. On her binder she had placed a sticker that said, “Spread
God’s Word.”
We all accepted her
for who she was, but when Mike decided to make fun of someone,
no one was immune. Mike flashed Rachel a smile, and sidled
over to her desk. She looked up shyly, unsure what to expect
from this guy who had never before acknowledged her. Before
we knew what was happening, Mike had grabbed Rachel’s
Bible and began reading. I cannot remember which passage he
read, but it had to do with not having sexual relations before
marriage. Rachel’s face went from pink, to a deep crimson
in a matter of seconds. Mike continued to read until someone
threw a pencil at him to make him shut up. Angered by the
gesture, Mike put the Bible down and began to speak to the
class. He talked about how stupid it was to follow a religion,
and how we were all wasting our time. None of us could believe
our ears. Then he grabbed Rachel’s binder and tore off
the sticker. Holding it above his head, he began ripping it
into little, tiny pieces. We were shocked. Mike, himself,
was Catholic; I had even seen him at church that past Sunday.
Rachel sat, huddled in her chair, crying silently into her
hands. Her religion, the one thing she believed in, was being
trash-talked to her face. Filled with rage, I stood and faced
Mike. “What is wrong with you? Why can’t you leave
her alone, can’t you see she’s upset? It used to
be funny, but you took it too far,” I said, loud enough
for the whole class to hear. Mike, shocked, opened and closed
his mouth as if he was struggling for air.
Later that day Rachel came up to me in the
hallway, and thanked me. She told me how humiliated she’d
felt, and how ashamed she was that she could not have taken
a stand herself. I told her that she had been upset, and it
wasn’t her fault. Mike was the only one to blame for
what had happened. We sat down at a lunch table and began
talking about how hard it was for her to fit in. We have been
good friends ever since.
When I think back, I think that Mike was
probably feeling insecure, which led him to make fun of Rachel.
It made him feel powerful, and in control, even though his
life may have been spinning out of control. Rachel, of course,
felt sad, alone, humiliated, and violated. From this experience,
I learned that the only reason people bully, is to make themselves
feel important. I also learned that by stepping in, one single
person can completely change the situation. It only takes
one person to make the difference.
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